AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!



Warning for the squeamish: bone crushing (literally) sound effects

Less than a month to go!!!

infp

creative, smart, idealist, loner, attracted to sad things, disorganized, avoidant, can be overwhelmed by unpleasant feelings, prone to quitting, prone to feelings of loneliness, ambivalent of the rules, solitary, daydreams about people to maintain a sense of closeness, focus on fantasies, acts without planning, low self confidence, emotionally moody, can feel defective, prone to lateness, likes esoteric things, wounded at the core, feels shame, frequently losing things, prone to sadness, prone to dreaming about a rescuer, disorderly, observer, easily distracted, does not like crowds, can act without thinking, private, can feel uncomfortable around others, familiar with the darkside, hermit, more likely to support marijuana legalization, can sabotage self, likes the rain, sometimes can't control fearful thoughts, prone to crying, prone to regret, attracted to the counter culture, can be submissive, prone to feeling discouraged, frequently second guesses self, not punctual, not always prepared, can feel victimized, prone to confusion, prone to irresponsibility, can be pessimistic

I close my eyes and the room spins. This tiredness is of the variety that makes me think I will never be untired. Its in my bones, I am worn down to the marrow.
But that is only because today is a grey Sunday and school starts tomorrow and that means that the giant sucking chest wound of a summer is over and that makes me think about it all.
I'm also fucked off because fuckhead ambushed me at the BBQ yesterday and was all pathetic and sad and it was the first time I had seen him since he broke my heart and it all came flooding back and now I am having trouble breathing again. My first words to him were "What part of 'I don't want to talk to you' did you not understand?" then I gave myself a little mental high five.
I was going to send him a big email telling him (again) to fuck off, but then Matt pointed out that I should just leave it, because he's not worth the energy.

But I have more blessings than I can count, and I can count very high, and some of them were out in force today when I spent the day with Maggie and we walked with Holly and I came home to my lovely house and pottered about and tried to make sense of the chaos that is my room. There are things in piles now, and other things in the rubbish and recycling bins, and things on shelves and in cupboards where they should be and that makes my mind more organised because if there is order in my external life then there is far more chance of me making sense of the category five hurricane that is my brain. And now is a good time to start making sense of it all because I have to be in class tomorrow and pretend that I know what I am on about.

Haha good luck with that!!!

The Monday update

This morning when I clicked on Stuff, I was greeted with this photo and that made me happy.

Yesterday I went to the laundromat and the man was there clearing the quarters out of all the machines and he did something to the machines I was using so that my washing was free. That made me happy too.

On Friday night I was all settled in watching geeky TV when Matt called to drag me out to Kitty Hoynes where I drank with the Irish for the first time in many years. You think I can drink? Damn, I got nothing on those lads. Nothing, I tells ya. Saturday was fun, in a "Holy shite I think my head might actually fall off" kind of way.

Flatmate is back tonight so yesterday I finally got my shit sorted and organised my room and last night I finally slept in my new bed of awesomeness and it is huge and fantastic and I think I am in love. I want to buy it presents.

This blog is rated O for Awesome

Turns out it IS what you get sometime

Today has been a good day.

I sent an email saying things that needed to be said and then closed the book on something and someone and I know that possibly the book may fall off the shelf and land open on the floor and need more of the story but for now I have fulfilled all my responsibilities and have been true to myself and feel all the better for it.

My dear friends the Expectant Married Couple took me out looking for something I need, and on the way stopped off just for me at the pet shop so I could coo over the puppies and pat the little hamster and talk to the birdies and get my baby animal fix for the day.

The much beloved Tyra came over and we shared stories and emails and thoughts and giggled at the ineptitude and continued idiocy and inability to Get The Point of what I and her have been saying for some time now and while its sad that the person in question remains oblivious to The Point you have to admit its kind of funny and I love that after everything we can share and be friends and she doesn't mind that I am still in my shorts-that-I-sleep-in when she comes over and am all dozy from too little cat-interrupted sleep.

She wrote something that is awesome, its here I suggest you read it.

And the fan is blowing and the borrowed cat is curled up cute and sleeping and I have a Dad who tells me that he is proud of me and that I should be true to myself before anything else, and a Mum who tells me I am strong and tells her friends all about me, and two sisters who are beyond fantastic and so strong and beautiful and the three babies who have no idea how much I love them because their lives are filled with people falling over themselves to love them and a best friend who would do anything I asked of her and the knowledge that there are couches and spare rooms in so many cities all over the world that I am welcome to and a family here that has grown and consolidated over this raw violent blistering car wreck of a summer and the knowledge that we are here and are part of something that will endure beyond graduate school and this town.

Also, I have really pretty hair.
And CSI starts on September 27th, which really isn't that far off.

Buckets of fun right here

The definition, in fact, of a box of fun?
Four chocolate labrador puppies in a box, having been taken to the vets for their puppy shots.

I believe I have mentioned these wee guys before, but having just found the cord that connects camera to computer it was finally time to share their little faces.







This wee guy REALLY wanted to come home with me, I could just tell.












The brothers Morris, at Monday's karaoke extravaganza.
Having met their parents a mere few days earlier, I can safely say that I like the entire family!!
How often does that happen?











Miss Tyra getting down with her bad self.

Turns out she really DOES rock the hizzouse.













Yep, I sang.
Me and Bobby McGee.
It was awesome. If by "awesome" you of course mean "prompted by beer and the lack of people in the bar". Yep.







In other news, I just responded to an email from Fuckhead McDickwad, and am happy to report that I employed the following phrase: "you over-estimate me. I am far from being too good-natured to remain unfriendly forever"
and restrained myself from telling him: "it may in fact be emotionally convenient to look for reasons to dislike you, but right now I don't need to look, seeing as how you are handing them out like condoms at Mardi Gras".

Have I mentioned recently how good it is to be me?

Reason #74 why Stephen Colbert is The Man

Even his icecream is awesome.

Cordell says that I shouldn't be allowed to eat this icecream because it should be for proper Americans, but I say in that case he shouldn't be allowed to eat pavlova and that seemed to do the trick.


Last night I waxed my eyebrows and my skin has rebelled against the waxing ouchies and today has delivered me a zitty treat.
Lovely, thanks skin.


Speaking of deliveries, the Canadian cat I am looking after left a rather stinky delivery in the bath-tub this morning. I suppose I should be grateful he didn't leave it in my bed, but I am still considering designs for a stylish cat-skin winter hat.

And having had my fill of Colbert-flavoured awesomeness, I shall adjourn to my room and let the paint-stripping and sanding continue.
Toodles.

Matthew Good's new song is fab

Yeah, I suck at blogging.
I would like to say that I'm uber busy doing fabulously exciting things, but then I would be lying and then I would have to smack myself and quite frankly I lack the inclination.

Saturday night supper club ended up here on, well.... Saturday night. It was motivation enough for me to get my house at least resembling something other than the aftermath of a category four hurricane. It was lovely and there was a cute baby and lovely salsa and other culinary delights and some awesome company.
Yeah ok, there was wine too.

On Thursday Tyra and I went to collect Felix from the vet where he had his "put a pin in my broken leg so it heals properly" surgery, and while we were waiting there was the opportunity to smooch not only one, but SEVEN Chocolate Labrador puppies. I took photos, of course, but the cord that connects my camera to my computer is somewhere in my room, and Saturday's cleaning/organising mission was restricted to the kitchen and living room.

There's nothing that really tops off a day like a box of squirming puppy love.
And now, because it is Sunday, I shall be downstairs drinking beer with my neighbour, as opposed to Friday night, when I was upstairs drinking beer with my neighbour.